Worries;;

So, I dyed my hair today. Chocolate velvet again. I like it when it's dark. My brain hurts lately. Like I'm trying so hard to just comprehend everything and it's not working. I'm...lifeless. Like, I can't find motivation for anything anymore. And I'm always tired. Emily's in the hospital. She had a seizure. We're all worried. It's like...we're all being picked off one by one. Bad things won't stop happening to our crew. I just got off the phone with Ayana. She told me she loved us and well to basically, stay alive. Bad things just keep happening and it seems it all goes back to Jazzie's car accident in February. It's worrying me. I love our little group and like Ay said, we all have to stick together. I hope to hear more news on Emily.

Ever have a freaky dream? One that no matter how many times you wake up and keep going back to sleep, it continues? I have. And last night was the craziest experience. In the dream, I kept wishing for things and they'd happen. So I wished for Josh to be there. I was in a really crowded restaurant. And he appeared standing by some table across the room. We immediately knew it was each other. He walked over and hugged me. He told me not to worry. That he was fine. That he'd never really leave just like he'd said previously. That he'd always find a way. And he said, "Hang in there sweetheart," like he always does. And it felt so real. That's what weirds me out. It's like he was really there. I hope he's okay. I hope I get to talk to him soon. He can't be gone. He just can't.

I love my crew. <3
JulianoEmilyCarrieAyanaJakeJazzie (: