Say a prayer, the summer nights are dead;

So, in twelve hours I will be on my way to school with Courtney. The last first day of high school for the rest of my life. I've got my messenger bag packed, my schedule, my senior project proposal almost done, a huge headache and a horrible stomach ache. But I guess I'm ready.

My car should be fixed tomorrow. I'm happy about that. But the money it will cost? Not so much.

All I can say is, get ready to fall back into routine. For one more year.

Class of 2011.

Hopefully this year will be a good one.

And maybe, just maybe, I won't die of stress.

One thing is for sure,
August is over.

Relax, relax. Exhale & breathe,

Guess what? I have 909 songs on my iPod! Yes, I'm happy about it.

I have so much to do tomorrow. Laundry, cleaning my bathroom and my room, going shopping. And I feel dead. Not so good with school starting on Wednesday.

I honestly have no idea why I'm blogging because there's really not much to talk about.

My sister's 21st birthday party was last night. At Black Bear casino. I can't drink or gamble, but she still wanted me there, so I went. And normally, that is not my atmosphere....at all. So I guess I was...very awkward, but it felt sort of good? I don't know. I had my first full drink. A bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade. And I watched them laugh and play drinking games. My sister was constantly making sure I was fine and I was, even if I was a bit awkward.

Oh and by the way, it really is nice to be complimented once in a while. (:

Just breathe for me,

This might not look like too big of a difference, but it really is. My hair was so short! I'm trying to decide if I like it longer. I mean, I do. I feel like maybe long is more me. Because the short was like I was trying to be edgy and risky...and I'm really not. That's random, I know. I'm rambling about my hair...which I tend to do a lot. I'm lame and I realize this.

Today Burger King got a new employee. I have a new coworker. He's 20 and I've heard of him. My sister knew him. Graduated with him. He was in the troops fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan for two years. Right out of high school. He's....well, he's a hero. And he's just a normal guy now working at Burger King. It was his first day today. And I remember a conversation:

"How old are you?"
"I'm seventeen. I'm gonna be a senior."
"It's weird to think that I graduated two years ago and I'm just getting a job and going to college now. It's weird having a job like this. Working fast food after you've been in a pit with a bunch of other guys in a uniform and you're not sure if you could be alive in the next few minutes."
"I could never do it. Do what you've done."
"It's....well, it's action that's for sure."
"Burger King is enough action for me, as far as I'm concerned."

It just....it really made me think for some reason... He dedicated two years of his life to fighting for our country. And he's still alive. And now he's starting his life.

School starts next Wednesday and I have one hell of a messed up sleeping pattern. This should be interesting...

Yes, I realize my blog posts are bipolar and change topic super quickly.

Your Love is My Drug.

Hey Ke$ha, I'm pretty sure that love sick crackhead you're referring to is me.

I feel like I've been on some high for the past....five hours? I'm so unbelievably happy that I catch myself just sitting here with tears in my eyes. Either that or I'm blasting music and singing along.

I really should listen to Emily more often. She said as soon as school started for him, he'd be back. And here he is. And it's that simple.

All I have to say is, I'm not on crack. I'm just happy. (:

I love you, dork. <3

Nerdy Quote of the day:
"Bagging food at Burger King is like playing tetris!"
-Cheng Xiong

Pretty sure that's all. I'm too scatterbrained to think.

Bittersweet;

My mother came into my room and shut the door behind her. My first thought: Shit, she's angry at me. But it was the opposite. She pulled me into a hug. She thanked me for caring about her. And told me she's proud to have me as a daughter and I'm a great person. It made me feel good. Made me tear up a bit.

Things are going to be okay. I've got to keep believing that.

Life just seems bittersweet right now. Like I'm extremely happy with where I am, yet extremely stressed and a little sad.

All I know is, I'm happy with who I am. Who I have become. I've changed for the better. I'm mature. And I've really invented myself into a finishing product that doesn't disappoint. At least, doesn't disappoint myself. And that's what matters the most.